censoring sucks (can I say that?)

Yeah, so I love to write and I can almost feel my thoughts untangling as I type (which is now much more effective than handwriting for me and way more legible). Also, as I have been searching through all the corners of the house for addresses and contact info that are stored in various mugs and files and lists and mostly obsolete card catalog thingy's, I have reflected often that there should be a way to use this internet phenomenon to connect with people quickly and easily and without using a whole ton of paper and ink to, say, share funny pictures of my current life. Aha. Someone else had the same thought and it is Facebook. Huh. Okay, so the world is divided on this issue into two camps represented quite nicely by my husband (who doesn't even want to be named online and is horrified that I'm blogging at all and thinks that online banking will send you straight to hell or at least identity bankruptcy) and myself, who loves to chat and has a very iffy filtering system for thoughts at the best of times and at the worst of times can really enjoy a conversation with way too much information.

And there we are. And, predictably, because I actually love my husband and am attracted to people like him (strong, silent, inscrutable, able to filter thoughts, and sound wise, and otherwise way more mature than me) roughly half of my friends (because I have listed you guys in this latest effort to re-connect and it has filled two pages of small handwriting) are like my un-nameable husband and have no online identity and probably don't want to have one. The other half are like me and very happy to chat and have a total of probably a million FB friends between them. So there you go. It all makes for cumbersome list-checking-off.

Add to this that I work in health care and with families with really quite complex medical and developmental issues going on and there is a HUGE confidentiality thing that I am constantly aware of and very very careful to respect in every possible way. And so the bulk of my life that is interesting to me and has fascinating anecdotes that happen frequently and in fact is a huge part of Who I Am, is really off-limits for any sort of chatting at all. So that leaves me able to talk about, hmm, the garden. Which is currently under 2' of snow and irrelevant to my feelings at this time.

Anyway, I am just wanting to say that I love the idea of blogging as a way to let you all back into my life in a more personal and up to date way than my Christmas letters used to. However, many of you (on my list) will never see this blog unless I really try hard to persuade you to find a portal into the www. Also, most of what I would like to tell you about I really can't because other people (such as my un-nameable husband) would Flip Out. Not to mention that I just can't talk about other stuff. And then there's the whole thing about kids online and should you really talk about your kids online and should you have images of them for the world to see . . . which my uncle-in-law who was an RCMP officer cautioned me about speaking from sad experiences and so that pretty much wraps up that topic, certainly in terms of anything specific.

AAAAAGH. I am still going to continue blogging, however, because, darn it, I like it. If you feel like I am talking in circles, though, that is why. I am circling around the real topics of my life like the ravens are circling around the dead squirrel hanging from the basketball hoop in our yard that my son just shot with his bow and arrow for his Science Fair project, which is to befriend a raven. See? That's priceless. Stuff like that you can't make up. Welcome to my life in Crutwell. I would describe it in greater and more interesting detail than that, but I have to figure out the censoring rules first.